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The Balnarring Invitational Tournament 2013

 

Winner on handicap:

Date:

Course:

Competitors:

On course coverage:

Prize winners:

 

Mild Colonial Boy

19th October 2013

St Andrews Beach

Player groups BIT 2013

On course at the BIT 2013

BIT presentations 2013

 

 

 

 

 

Event Report:

‘A BIT fore Mild’

Saturday 19th October 2013: So the 11th running of the Balnarring Invitational Tournament (BIT) was as controversial as ever, which was as expected considering it is the most prestigious and best patronised nomad’s Golf Club major event each year. Controversial because this year the ‘interlopers’ had to pay for their food. “About time and a good thing too” commented Thombei The Mist after reading this article. Controversial because the organisers forgot to present the Teams event trophy and prizes “I mean that’s the only reason I came down. What a shemozzle” reinforced a very surprised Curtis after the presentations. Controversial because Clean Phil didn’t finish the round. “Look I had a board meeting in town so I could only play the nine holes.” he explained by text after his most noticeable disappearance. Controversial because not a single South Australian turned up for the event. “Well The Tanunda Kid is getting married the next weekend. So they all had to rest up and prepare for that.” explained an embarrassedCaptain’ when he dropped in for a free meal the previous night.

National field as usual: Despite the absence of the South Australians, competitors came from five mainland states and territories creating a truly national field. And this standout group included two new competitors from the ACT, an excellent development in anyone’s language. “Yeah, two very experienced Uralba Open tour members so you couldn’t go wrong there could you” confirmed event organiser Nurse Min. “Well I’m not so sure …..” mumbled The Cardinal who was subsequently drowned out by the gallery before he could deliver the rest of his sentence.

So the final sixteen were all quality players exampled by the first group comprising of Don Johnson, The Hanging Judge, The Cardinal and Billy and again by the second group with Markus Octavious, Freddie Five Iron, Clean Phil and Bobby. The third group with Slugger, The Bloke, Rubber Man and Stavros the Greek was equally impressive as was the final group with Roger the Lodger, The Maroon Breasted Warbler, The Mild Colonial Boy and Nurse Min. It was clear from the outset that with a national field like that - anything could happen, and indeed it did (see BIT player groups 2013).

Impressive on and off the course: Now it is important to put this competition into context because it would be difficult to fully understand the challenge facing these competitors if you didn’t. This was the second competition for the weekend (so everyone should have been practiced and in good form after the game the day before). It was played after a sensational night of brilliant, food and great wine (so everyone should have been well nourished). All competitors were housed at a single sensational location ‘Palmers Hill’ with lots of comfy beds (so everyone should have been well rested after a great night’s sleep). In other words it was the perfect lead up the event. “I just don’t follow your logic. We were buggered after the game the day before, we ate and drank far too much, we got to bed way too late and most of us felt pretty shitty and slow on the morning of the competition” observed first time attendee  Rodger The Lodger as he reinterpreted the previous description.

Taking a slightly different tack, the St Andrews course was in perfect condition and the weather sublime, setting up the perfect conditions for those that could overcome their hangover. Mind you it should be said that the c_ _ t grass was exceptionally long, meaning that anyone that ended up off the fairway certainly had their work cut out for them. But the quality of these players showed through as they stepped up to truly challenging tees, enormous bunkers, long wide fairways and lighting fast greens. It was a display that any gallery would be fascinated to watch (see on course at the BIT in 2013 and the house, food and personalities in 2013).

A BIT fore Mild: But at the end of the day there can only be one winner and what a winner he was this year. After being beaten by The Bloke in a playoff in the TSCC the day before, The Mild Colonial Boy (93,18,75) finally prevailed by one stroke over Markus Octavious (108,32,76) and Stavros the Greek (107,30,77) in third place. And it was a convincing performance because Mild took out a longest drive, was equal with Rodger the Lodger in another longest drive and to top it off took out a nearest the pin.

Huge celebration at the presentations: So as you can imagine, the presentations were a true celebration of quality golf as Mild Colonial Boy stepped up to take the BIT trophy for 2013. And the gallery went wild as a long list of prizes were handed out to worthy winners based on their performance over the course of the weekend. For example, The Cardinal got the other NTP; Clean Phil was awarded the ‘Oh My Gourd’ Award for a round of 84 strokes over the nine holes he played; Rodger the Lodger was awarded the ‘Barman’s Friend’ award for services to alcohol beyond the call of duty, Bobby got the ‘Encouragement Award’ for his first time efforts at the BIT, The Cardinal got the ‘Shark’ Award for controlled aggression under pressure when preparing the meal the previous night, and Curtis got the ‘Endeavour’ Award for arriving at exactly the right time, even though he didn’t play in the event (see 2013 BIT presentations).

A humble winner: “It is a privilege to win this event when the quality of the competition is considered.” started out Mild as Nurse Min handed him the trophy. But he was drowned out by the wild singing from the Gallery. “There is only one Tony Mmmmmchl, only one Tony Mtchl …” blasting out over the crowd…… “Hold on! That’s not how it went. Rather everyone went deadly quiet when Mild was announced as the winner” suggested Freddie Five Iron who had been confused by the previous description of events. But it didn’t matter because Mild Colonial Boy was clearly a most worthy winner on the day while the rest of the field dreamed of what might have been.

The committee congratulates The Mild Colonial Buoy on his superior performance and of course all other prize winners on the day. Special thanks to event sponsors Day-n-Nite Electrical, TM Enterprises and Hydralyte because without their support the event would never have happened. Finally a huge thankyou to BIT event organiser Nurse Min for bringing us yet another brilliant nnomads GC competition. The committee also suggests that interested players should book early for next year’s BIT event because the return rate for this year’s players is likely to be extremely high (and the South Australian may return in force?).

 

Detailed Results

The Balnarring Invitational Tournament 2013

Player

Gross

HCP

Net

Prizes

 

Tony

93

18

75

Winner on nnomads handicap, Longest drive x 2, NTP x 1

Mark F

108

32

76

2nd on nnomads handicap

Harry

107

30

77

3rd on nnomads handicap

Fang

104

26

78

Shark Attack Award 2013

Steph

102

22

80

 

Geoff M

108

24

84

Barman’s’ Friend Award 2013

Min

121

36

85

 

Shanksy

106

21

85

 

Bryan C

114

28

86

 

Mark V

108

21

87

 

Fritz

125

36

89

 

Rodney

114

24

90

 

Jack

115

23

92

 

Steve

119

26

93

 

Robert L

139

30

109

The Encouragement Award 2013

Phil R

DNF

36

DNF

Oh my Gourd Award 2013

 

 

Player groups BIT 2013

On course at the BIT 2013

House, Food and Personalities

BIT presentations 2013

 

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This month’s competition: Who broke the chair?